IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!! I don’t usually make a big production out of my birthday, and this year’s no different. No party, no big hoo-haa. But if you feel moved to do something special to mark the day, plug in some Cher or Elvis and dance around in my name. Also, gift cards to Lane Bryant are always adored!
When your birthday rolls around, do you think about where you were and what you were doing on your birthday last year? How things, and you, have changed in the last year? I do. It’s been a great year. Ok, 90-95% great, but really, who has a perfect anything. Unless you’re Deidra Hall, but she’s like Elvis; they shouldn’t factor in with the rest of us mere mortals…throws off the curve. Besides, I can’t be her and I’ll never find a copy of him, so I’ve given up on both. I guess with some age does come some wisdom.
In all seriousness, even though there have been some not-so-great events, I’ve really had a ball this past year. Part of the not so great part is that I was told by an honest mortgage broker (yes they’re out there, call me I’ll give you his number) that I’ve got to get a different job before I can buy a house, and right now, there’s not much out there, so no new house for Brandi in the near future.
Also under the seriously not-so-great heading, Patrick is in either Iraq or Afghanistan and has been since the end of January. Unlike before, there’s no computer hook up where he’s at so that means no emails, no im’s to let me know my baby brother is ok. I love that little imp and I can’t wait to get him home.
Most of ya’ll know that Daddy died in December. Sis told me that I needed “closure” with Daddy and all the stuff that had happened, or rather, had not happened, over the years and she said that when it was over, I’d wish I had. I thought, well, maybe, but I doubt it. Either way, I’ve made my decision and Vashti will not budge once her mind is made up. Hate to disappoint you, but I know myself better than you do (shocker huh) and I’m good. Rest assured, if the fates prove you right and someday I wish I had, I’ll let you know.
Even though it didn’t “hit me” like everyone swore it would, it did affect me. My step-mother lost her husband, my sister and brother lost their father, my aunts & uncles lost their brother, my cousins lost their uncle…people I care about lost someone they loved. My heart hurt for Uncle Ralph and Uncle Jim when they talked about not just losing a brother-in-law, but a friend, Uncle Ralph especially because they had been so close for so long. I will admit though, it was funny how in talking about his children they talked about Patrick and Brittany, but somehow, I got left out. C’mon gentlemen…I’m a big ol’ girl…how can ya miss me!
As cold as it may sound, the thing that worried me the most about Daddy’s condition was knowing that Patrick was about to be deployed, and that he’d be sent into a war zone wondering if his father was going to die. But fate stepped in and he was home got to spend time with Daddy before the end and for that I am eternally grateful. I loved Daddy because he was my Daddy. But the bottom line is that we weren’t close and the responsibility for that, to a certain degree, lay at both our feet. He was my Daddy and I see that, every time I look in the mirror. I have my father’s eyes. Besides, he gave me 2 of the best things ever…a great kid brother and an amazing head of hair.
Ok, now onto the good stuff!
We’ve officially started on the house! The slab was poured this past weekend and the living room is gonna be huge – 2, maybe 3 times the size of the living room nowIt’s a family reunion year! I’m really excited about that. I’ll admit that I love the actual event more than pretty much anything, but the planning is a lot of fun. A lot of work, but a lot of fun.
I have turned into a road trippin’ fool – the Pixie had had some miles put on her and there’s more in the future – 2 coming up in this month. On the first one in November, I met some folks and made some great new friends. One of which, I’m trying to figure out how even though we grew up totally different, how we have so much in common. There’s about 15 pounds less of me than there was in November – those cute jeans I bought to wear to the Peanut Festival that fit so good now look like a family of illegal aliens moved out – and there’s probably even more less (does that make sense) of me than there was on my last birthday. In fact, I’m sitting here in my “Elvis” jeans – black jeans with rhinestones on the legs that I haven’t work in about 4 1/2 – 5 years. Getting into these jeans was my goal #1. I don’t have a goal #2 because I had no idea when I’d get to goal #1.
Sis was telling me the other day about a conversation they had with Kayleigh’s counselor and from what I understood, not only would she be able to graduate a year early (she’s not, wants to grad with her pals) but because of her grades, she’s eligible for all kinds of scholarships and can pretty much write her own ticket. This only confirms what I’ve always believed…the kid’s the sharpest knife in the drawer. I am so proud of her it’s not funny. The idea that in less than year, she’s going to be 18 just blows my mind. I could have sworn we took her to her first day of kindergarten last August (I was a wreck that day). Aunt Katie (Kayleigh’s Grandmother) sent me a card and she said, “I can't believe how fast you girls are passing by the birthdays.” Yep…I get it now.
I know some folks who worry about getting older, but we’ve often quoted my Aunt Myrtle, “I can’t help getting older, but I don’t have to get old.”I said something the other day at work about being 36 and one of the students who was standing around said, “I can’t believe you just said that?” I asked what, and he said, “ Most women get cagy about how old they are, but you just put it out there.” Well why not? Forget this 18 or 21 years old with ___ of years experience. Nope, I’m here and like the old ladies I grew up watching, I’m just getting better. It’s usually women who fret about it, but I’ll never forget when Alan turned 30. Me, being me and loving Big Al like I do (and I mean that), came home with black balloons, I think a black cake was involved…and he looked at me and said, “You’ll be 30 one day too.” To which I replied, “Yeah Al, but you’ll be 35!” He didn’t but I swear he wanted to smack me, at the least throw something at me. How did what started out being an “All About Me” post turn out to be about everybody else? Easy. Even though it’s my birthday this year wouldn’t have been what it was, for better or worse, because of all ya’ll.
Do I have a plan for this year…you betcha! I’m gonna have the time of my life. I promise you, I will have an even better year and the “year in review March 2010” will be the icing on the cake only to be topped by “year in review March 2011”. I plan to put a bow in my hair, a crown on my head and do my best to have the best stories to tell in the old folks home when the time comes. Why not?
The thing to remember is that we’re gonna get old and when we do all we’ll have are the memories we make now, and not just the ones we make for ourselves, but the ones we leave with others. We’re all gonna die someday and when you die, the people – especially the kids in your life – you leave behind need to remember 3 things; how much you loved them, the things you taught them, and how much you loved life. Except for coffee cups, neither Granny nor any of the old ladies left me anything tangible but everyone of them; Granny, Mother, Granny Webb, Aunt Myrtle, Aunt Abbie, Aunt Helen Evans, Aunt Cedar, Aunt Dorice and God knows Aunt Mary – left me with the best memories of a bunch of old girls who would do or say anything (only Aunt Dorice tried to be kind all of the time), who told what was right and wrong, but most of all, that they loved me. Someday, when I kick off, I hope I can leave any of the kids who call me Buddy or Aunt Brandi with memories that are half as happy, crazy, loving or sweet as the ones I have, then I’ve done my job and I’m good to go.
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