I’ve always got something to say. You'll see comments on music, books, TV shows or movies that strike my fancy. I’m an opinionated patriotic female & I’m Southern to my soul. My political POV is more conservative but just because we disagree I don’t think you’re an idiot. It's an opinion. Please feel free to comment, but I ask that you be respectful to me and anyone else posts. Rude or insulting comments will be deleted.
Friday, October 30, 2009
My Life as a Big Girl
I won’t get on a soapbox about how the fashion industry and Hollywood have distorted the idea of what women are supposed to look like and created body image issues for generations of women. That road has been taken so many times the pavement’s worn out. Yes, they do bear a good part of the blame, but you can’t lay all of the blame on magazines, the movies, models, fashion or anyone else. It’s your body, no one else’s. There comes a time when you have to be accountable for your actions and behavior. Unless you have a medical condition, the only person who is responsible for you being overweight and out of shape is you. You’ve got two choices; 1) Change it. Jill Conner Brown (THE Sweet Potato Queen) said "If you aren't loving life, change it," and to me that means ANY aspect 2). Deal with it. Stop complaining, stop blaming. Own your life and all that it entails. If you're happy with yourself and your life and you're basicly healthy, to hell with any and everyone else and their opinions.
I’ve been overweight since I was about 10 yrs old. The pictures and video from Mama & Pop’s wedding that year, I looked like I was smuggling basketballs! When I was real little, I was such a picky eater and I guess they were so happy I was eating, they didn’t think there was a problem. By the time we all realized I was fat (I’m not scared of the word), I was old enough to do something about it myself and I tried...sort of. I have been on all kinds of crazy diets; when I was about 14 two cousins and I decided to go on the diet they put patients on before heart surgery! I lasted all of 1 day...could not stomach the beets or the tuna. I’ve counted fat, calories, carbs, portions you name it. I’ve drank teas, taken prescription diet pills, OTC diet pills, you name it. I’d lose weight but I’d abandon the diet not because I wasn’t dropping pounds but just because I wasn't dropping them fast enough, I was lazy and it wasn’t that big of a deal to me. I liked myself, I was happy with my life the weight wasn’t really in the way so why make myself crazy. Well, in Oct. of 2008 it became a big deal.
I’d gotten bronchitis again and started popping all kinds of OTC cold meds. When it didn’t work I finally gave up and went to the doctor where my blood pressure was sky high and at 273, my weight was higher than it’s ever been in my life! Knowing the history of heart disease and strokes on Mama’s side of the family, the blood pressure scared me big time, but the nurse said that was probably because of the cold meds. I went back a week later and it was a little high (a couple of points) but nothing to worry about. But the weight was still a health issue. Maybe because I was 35 – just 5 months from my 36th birthday – I realized that if I didn’t do something now, I was in serious trouble. I knew something had to change, but I also knew from past experience that pills and fad diets were not the path for me.
First I had to eat right. The couple of bags of chips, you know the ones that say on the label that it’s actually 3 servings – I snacked on at work had to stop. I had to start exercising and walking to the elevator did not count. Eating as much or more than my Pop at dinner was not a good thing. When I thought about everything I had to change I was totally discouraged. There was no way in the world I was gonna do that. What did I do? Get a pint of mint-chocolate chip ice cream and settle in to watch an old movie. There on my television was one of the most beautiful women EVER and one that I’d always wanted to look like – Rita Hayworth. There she was; driving Glenn Ford insane, singing and dancing in “the black” dress...mocking me and my ice cream. Then I had an epiphany...who said I had to change everything at once? Where is it written?
So once I was sure I wasn’t going to die of consumption (still fighting bronchitis), I put the ice cream in the freezer and decided to use yogurt to feed a craving for something sweet. I switched the Doritos for Sun Chips or pretzels. A couple of weeks later, I started eating a kinda-sorta breakfast burrito instead of cereal or leftovers. Then I changed from the frozen lunches I was eating (actually, eating 2 for lunch) to soups. Next step was abandoning the “at work” snacks. That was easier than I thought.
New Year’s Day I got on the scales – I hadn’t even looked at scales since I left the doctor’s office that day in mid-October – and I was 265. That’s the day I started walking. Barely half a mile later and I thought, no, I was sure that my lungs were going to explode, my legs were going to fall off, I was going to die and they could bury me where I dropped. A few weeks later, I added weights and crunches. Did I exercise every day? No, but at least 3 days a week I did something. (I haven't been as) dedicated lately) I took the stairs at work. If I had something for someone, I didn’t use interoffice mail I walked it over to them. Before I knew it, clothes were fitting looser. Pants that I had been wearing comfortably required a belt. I’d bought a pair of jeans for a concert the first week of November. They were a 22 and they fit perfect! I put them on one Saturday afternoon...and they were baggy! BAGGY! I could put them in the dryer and they’d be good for a few hours and after a few months, even that didn’t work. They would literally fall down about mid-hip. I haven’t been able to wear them – even with a belt since July. The last jeans I bought were 18’s. I always envied my Granny because the woman could drop weight simply by deciding to do so and it looks like I may be more like her than I thought.
This is just the first blog here. I’m going to post my “progress” (maybe with pictures) as I go. I don’t have a goal weight, however, I’ve got a pair of 38/32 men’s Wrangler’s hanging up in my bedroom as inspiration. I used to joke that if I got smaller than a size 16, I’d move into Jimmy’s (it’s a 50+ yr old diner here in town) until I got back, but the closer I get, the more I think I might have to reevaluate. I don’t wanna be skinny, not by any stretch of the imagination. I never have. I guess that’s because when I was growing up, I didn’t wanna look like a supermodel. The women I thought were the most beautiful; the ones I wanted to look like weren’t on a runway. I wanted to look like Susan Seaforth Hayes, Suzanne Rogers and Deidra Hall from Days of Our Lives, Rita Hayworth in Gilda, and Jane Russell in anything. Yes, they are women two and three generations before me, but they were gorgeous. They didn’t look like boys or pre-pubescent girls...they looked like women and they had curves for God’s sake!
Do I think that only “real women have curves”? No. And if you do, you’re just as out of your mind as all of those people who think that skinny or thin is "always" healthy. Every woman, every person, is different and will not fit into the same mold. To think so is insane. I’ve lost almost 40 pounds since this time last year because I finally decided to stop dieting and focus on getting healthy instead of losing weight, and that's what I should have done all along. As long as you’re healthy and happy with yourself, the number on the scales or the tag in your clothes shouldn’t matter. Trisha Yearwood released a song a few years back called "Real Live Woman" and the lyrics are...well...perfect. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cn9d8Xi_Cw
REAL LIVE WOMAN (Trisha Yearwood)
I don't buy the lines in magazines
That tell me what I've gotta be
Don't base my life on a movie screen
Don't fit the mold society
Has Planned
I don't need to be 19 years old
Or starve myself for some weight I'm told
Will turn men's heads, been down that road
And I thank God I finally know
Just who I am
I ain't a movie star
May never see the view from where they are
And this old town may be as far as I'm goin'
But what he'll hold tonight in his hands
He swears is so much better than
Anything this old world
Can show him
Cause I'm a real live woman
In love with this man I see lyin' here next to me
Lost in the way that he's holdin'
This real live woman
In the arms of a man where
I'll fall asleep knowin' there's
Nothin' on earth he loves more than
This real live woman
I work 9-5 and I can't relate
To millionaires who somehow fate
Has smiled upon and fortune made their
Common lives a better place to be
Cause I'm a real live woman
In love with this man I see lyin' here next to me
Lost in the way that he's holdin'
This real live woman
In the arms of a man where
I'll fall asleep knowin' there's
Nothin' on earth he loves more than
This real live woman
And I no longer justify
Reasons for the way that I behave
I offer no apologies
For the things that I believe and say
And I like it that way
Cause I'm a real live woman
In love with this man I see lyin' here next to me
Lost in the way that he's holdin'
This real live woman
In the arms of a man where
I'll fall asleep knowin' there's
Nothin' on earth he loves more than
This real live woman
My Ramblings
Brandi
More to Love/Reality TV (Aug. 2009)
Reality shows are the worst thing to happen to television EVER! I won’t say that I don’t watch reality shows, but usually only if something/someone catches my eye. I watch Dancing with the Stars if there’s someone on there I like (as far as I’m concerned, do-overs to sooth a bruised male ego do not count and Kelly Monaco is and always will be the first DWTS champ and Laila Ali was robbed!) and Survivor after the merge. Unless there’s a really hot guy (Boo Bernis from Fiji comes to mind), then I’m all in. Yes, I’m shallow, but not about important things.
In my opinion, one of the worst of them all has to be the Bachelor/Bachelorette. I’ve watched one episode of The Bachelor and I’ve never watched an episode of The Bachelorette. I could not believe that I was watching these women cry in front of the camera for millions of people to watch, talk about how they’re looking for true love and companionship, who honestly think they can find it in this venue and end up sobbing and miserable when a virtual stranger doesn’t give them a rose. I refuse to blame men, the public, or anyone else for women embarrassing themselves like this and allowing a man to pick them like cattle at auction or a sandwich in a cafeteria line. Don’t they have any pride? Are they so desperate for a man that they humiliate themselves like this?
What does it say about the people who make it appointment viewing? I read somewhere that this highest demographic that watches The Bachelor/Bachelorette is women! My question to them is this; do you enjoy watching other women humiliate themselves? Why? Do you actually think that you can find “twuue wuuve” under these circumstances? Look, I read Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, etc when I was a kid, those were fairy tales. How many marriages have come from these shows? One I think. It’s like the stories of young women who became hookers after watching Pretty Woman because they actually thought they’d find a man like the Richard Gere character who’d “save them”.
Now there’s another show in this vein – More to Love. I know some folks are all excited about this because it’s about plus sized/real sized women, but I don’t think having a dating show about big chicks is necessarily a great thing. It’s only putting them into the same self-demeaning light as every other woman who puts herself on one of these shows. They were acting just like the "skinny girls" on The Bachelor -- crying and all but begging this guy to notice them. When the first five were sent home on the first episode, one girl was sobbing because she felt such a stong connection and knew she could really fall in love with him. WHAT? You just met him! You spent maybe 3 hours in the same room with him and like 15 other women? How can you know you could fall in love with him? I guess the only thing more “entertaining” that watching skinny beautiful women debasing themselves is watching overweight beautiful women do the same. I watched the first episode and was so embarrassed for these women. There were a couple of the women on the show who didn’t come across as so desperate to get a man they’d do just about anything, but I’m guessing that will soon change or they won’t “get the ring back”. In the spirit of full disclosure, I am plus-size, full-size, real-size, BBW, whatever you want to call it. I am about 5’10, weight 240 pounds (down 25 pounds/almost 3 sizes since November) and wear a size 18/20. There were women on this show who were both bigger and smaller than me. I’m comfortable enough with myself that on occasion, I call myself a big-ol-girl and even .. a fat-chick! Mama calls me her farm hand and Amazon.
Yes, dating is harder for women who aren’t “typical”. Basically, if you’re considered overweight, for the most part, you can cast your line in the Lake of Love, and you’re gonna get very few nibbles. The stereotype of an overweight girl/ woman desperate for a boyfriend/husband is prevalent enough do we really need a show like this to make it worse?
Now I’ve never thought of myself as a feminist, but maybe in some ways I am. There is no logical reason why men and women shouldn’t be treated equally in pay, rights and responsibilities. To state that in 2009 seems kind of ludicrous, but I’ve become surprised lately. If I do the same job as a man, have the same educational background and experience, I should get paid the same. Even though my personal beliefs are completely against it, I believe that Roe-v-Wade should stand. I am perfectly capable of taking out my own garbage, killing bugs (for the exception of one that will cause me to do harm to myself trying to get away), moving something, hanging something, changing a tire, and pumping my own gas. I’ve even hung blinds, fixed a sink AND a toilet. All of that having been said, if there’s a man around, I’m going to see if I can get him to do it first! I (and other women my age) tend take for granted some things that generations of women had to fight for; the right to own property, birth control, education, and, the one I feel is most important, the right to vote. I guess you could say I’m a kinda-sorta Feminist...or is that like being a little pregnant?
I don’t have a boyfriend (that sounds so jr. high ). I’d like to have one (that sounds even more jr. high ), but as I've said before, it’s not the prime directive of my existence. Maybe I’m too picky. I've been told by several people who know me that I am Shakespeare’s Beatrice (Much Ado About Nothing), and I take that as a compliment. We watched the movie this weekend and it’s even more obvious now than then! Maybe I have too much pride, but I just can’t imagine myself going on national television and having the man that, in theory, I’m going to spend the rest of my life with, chose me playground style! I would rather spend the rest of my life single than to do that!
My grandmother and all but one of her sisters were born without the right to vote. I can’t imagine that! My point is (yes, there is one) is that in the almost 90 years since women were given the right to vote, we have gotten to the point in front of millions for their entertainment, we will grovel for the attention of a man? What are shows like these teaching our daughters – or our sons for that matter – about love and relationships?
Pig in Cool Mud (April 2009)
· I have a job that, though it doesn’t pay a boat load of money, it’s a heck of a lot more than I used to make and for both of those things, I am thankful. 9 days out of 10 I love going to work, have fun doing what I do, and I enjoy the people I work with.
· I have a car that I love!! It’s in my name and I pay for it. The Dixie Pixie (yes, I’ve named my car) gets amazing gas mileage and looks great to boot! I road trip it with a couple of friends to concerts when the mood and event suit me/us. It’s usually an average 4 hour drive and a cost about $50 each including gas, hotel, tickets and food. True, of late the road trips usually involve going to see Jimmy Wayne, Bucky Covington, Jason Michael Carroll, next month we’re adding Billy Currington to the list and I'm waiting for Joe Nichols to hit the road again (memories and images of shows past, shows to come…someone pass me a bib, a fan and a glass of ice water ). We have a ball and the lion’s share of the fun happens on the way to and from. As it turns out, the shows are just an excuse.
· One of the above mentioned shows I was supposed to be accompanied by a cousin who couldn’t make it and instead of backing out entirely, I went solo and made some great friends that I actually have contact with, if not every day then at least a few times a week. Not just email, online, MySpace, etc, we actually have conversations that don’t require a keyboard and revolve around something other than the shows we’ve been to, are going to, or the people we’ve gone to see. Shocking, I know, but it’s true!
· I AM SINGLE! I come and go as I please, I don’t have to ask permission/clear it with someone to go somewhere, do something, buy something, or make plans. All I really need to worry about is making the room in my budget and/or getting the day off. If that’s done, I am good to go!
· I don’t have to worry about being with someone who shows me blatant disrespect, talks to or treats me like a second class citizen or berates me for what I do or what he thinks I should be doing.
· I have a crown that I made for myself because I deserved it. According to “THE Sweet Potato Queen” Jill Conner Brown – and I have no reason to doubt her -- every woman deserves a crown. You can buy one, but then you run the risk of someone that you don’t know or, even worse, someone you don’t like, having one like yours. Do what I did…get the stuff and make it your ownself. Then you can be sure that unless you make one for someone else, you’ll have the only one like it. Just like a smile on your face -- if you don’t have a crown it’s your own fault.
For as long as I can remember, people who love me have busied themselves with me having or getting a husband or why I didn’t have a boyfriend or husband to the point of once even signing me up for…wait for it…a dating service! I’m sure all the talk about me finding Mr. Right is rooted in a desire for me to be happy, but why is my getting married such a big deal for them? Would I like to have “someone”? Yeah, sure, I don’t think anyone aspires to be single forever, but having a man attached to me has never been the end all/be all of my life and probably never will be. To be honest, when I look at the men I meet as well as the past and present husbands/boyfriends of some of the folks who are constantly telling me to find Mr. Right, I think I’d rather be single than have to deal with some of the crap I see or have to put up with what they’ve been through. I know all men aren’t pigs or punks, but let me tell you, the pickings are mighty slim and mostly what I’ve encountered is what the wise and wonderful Prothro would call “chofer lips”.
Maureen Dowd, an op-ed write for the New York Times (I can’t believe I’m quoting a writer from the NYT) said “The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.” Well, I’m 36 years old and I refuse to do something life changing simply because it’s expected. To me, that would be settling. I came close to it before and I don't plan to do it again. I didn’t, and won’t get married because it’s what I'm supposed to do by a certain age, to get out of the house or any other reason except because it’s what I want, because in my mind, that would be settling.
Maybe I sound selfish, self-centered or something else of that nature, but the fact of the matter is that the most important thing is that right now, for me anyway, is that I‘m happy with the way things are. I do thank you for your love and concern for my happiness and if you love me as much as I know you do, you should be tickled pink that I’m as happy as I am and be just as happy for me. When I stop being happy, rest assured…then I’ll do something about it. Until then worry not, loved ones, I am just fine!
RIP: Ed, Farrah & Michael (June 2009)
Like everyone else, I’m still trying to absorb the events of the day. After a lousy night’s sleep, I started the day at about half power and as I walked out the front door heading to work, my sunglasses fogged up and I tripped and fell into the front of my car and I thought, can this day get any worse? Well, it did. By the end of the day and within a few hours two icons –Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson – were gone just days after Ed McMahon. I grew up watching the Tonight Show and stealing Johnny’s jokes and even Ed’s comebacks because as everyone knows, no funnyman is funny without a great straight man and Ed McMahon was the best. All I can think now is that Johnny’s pretty happy to have his old friend on his right side and that Fred De Cordova is producing a new episode of “The Tonight Show” with a couple of special guests.
I can't say I was surprised when Ed died. The last few times I’d seen him, he looked pretty rough, he was up there in age so it was, in a way, expected. The Labor Day Telethon on't be the same this year without him. I didn’t expect Farrah to die. Ok, let me rephrase that. I didn’t want her to die. Even though they’re scarce, I’d really hoped and prayed for a miracle for her. She was the “It” girl of the 70’s and everyone in the world has seen “the poster”. Her hair was more famous that Jennifer Aniston’s hair. If you think about it, Farrah’s hair was more famous than Jennifer! When she married Lee Majors in, 73 or 74, they were the super couple, and in the “I Am Woman” vibe of the decade, I don't think the feminists were happy when she changed her name to Farrah Fawcett-Majors. Unfortunately, she became known more for her hair and her looks instead of for something that people who considered themselves fans knew about—her talent. Don’t believe me? Watch The Burning Bed, Poor Little Rich Girl: The Barbara Hutton Story, or Margaret Bourke-White. The woman had chops and I watch her every chance I get. When Michael Landon announced that he had cancer my uncle said “Oh he’ll be fine, he’s got plenty of money.”Cancer is something that no one is safe from, no one is immune and anyone can succumb to it, and now Farrah Fawcett is another name added to that list.
The one that no one saw coming, that has shocked everyone was the death of Michael Jackson. I can remember staying up to watch the premier of the video for Thriller, not on MTV, but on – you might wanna sit down for this– Friday Night Videos! Yes, kiddies, back in the day there were other video outlets besides MTV. Friday Night Videos, Night Tracks, I think there was another one too. (Those were the days when videos were actually about the song or the group/singer and not a challenge to see how many half-nekkid bodies they could get in a single shot, but I digress).When they released “The Making Of Thriller” it was a party at our house. I'm pretty sure it was Spring Break weekend and Aunt Katie rented it and we piled up in the living room (because granny was just as big of a Michael Jackson fan as we were), ordered pizza and watched it all weekend. We rented it several times and in spite of the fact it was one of the most popular video rentals, Manuel always seemed to have a copy when we wanted it. I’ve always suspected he kept a secret copy behind the counter for us, but I can’t be sure. I can’t believe I’m about to use these words, but in the early days of music videos there were 2 powerhouse acts you knew without a doubt would deliver the best video possible and Michael Jackson was one of them (Duran Duran being the other). He was one of the organizers and writers of We Are the World he was involved in Live Aid. Michael Jackson was at the center of music and pop culture in the 80’s. Period, end of sentence. I don’t know a girl who wasn’t crazy about him, a boy who didn’t wanna dance like him (we all saw those boys trying desperately to moonwalk down the halls in school).That having been said, I haven’t been a fan of his newer music in a very long time. I think the last thing he did that I enjoyed was Bad. I don’t know what happened to him. I don’t think anyone does, and I hated it. His influence is undeniable and it will forever be felt.
Once the radical plastic surgeries began, it seemed like not only could we not recognize Michael, he couldn’t recognize himself. Sometimes I thought that maybe that was the plan…he didn’t want to see himself. To call to mind the title of one of his songs, maybe he was trying to hide from the man in the mirror. I felt sorry for Michael Jackson. Here he was; one of the richest men in the world, He had fame, he had fortune and he could buy anything in the world he wanted and I felt sorry for him. Because the one thing he couldn’t buy, even with all of the money he had, was the ability for his life to be his own. From the time he was a child, he was famous. I can’t imagine living like that, and he knew nothing else.
The comparisons are being made to Elvis and on one hand it drives me crazy because there never has been, never will be another Elvis. But when I look at it objectively, I can understand. They both changed music in their own way. They had someone managing their careers (for the most part) who didn’t just manage it, they controlled it and by extension, controlled Elvis and Michael respectively. They reached and sustained a level of fame and adoration that few, if any, do. They both got caught up in their fame and had no way out. They were prisoners of that fame and adoration. Kenny Chesney said in an interview once that if his life became like Elvis’ he’d just get on his boat and float away, “…That's all Elvis needed -- a boat." Maybe instead of buying Neverland Michael Jackson should have just bought a boat.
Birthday Blog (March 2009)
When your birthday rolls around, do you think about where you were and what you were doing on your birthday last year? How things, and you, have changed in the last year? I do. It’s been a great year. Ok, 90-95% great, but really, who has a perfect anything. Unless you’re Deidra Hall, but she’s like Elvis; they shouldn’t factor in with the rest of us mere mortals…throws off the curve. Besides, I can’t be her and I’ll never find a copy of him, so I’ve given up on both. I guess with some age does come some wisdom.
In all seriousness, even though there have been some not-so-great events, I’ve really had a ball this past year. Part of the not so great part is that I was told by an honest mortgage broker (yes they’re out there, call me I’ll give you his number) that I’ve got to get a different job before I can buy a house, and right now, there’s not much out there, so no new house for Brandi in the near future.
Also under the seriously not-so-great heading, Patrick is in either Iraq or Afghanistan and has been since the end of January. Unlike before, there’s no computer hook up where he’s at so that means no emails, no im’s to let me know my baby brother is ok. I love that little imp and I can’t wait to get him home.
Most of ya’ll know that Daddy died in December. Sis told me that I needed “closure” with Daddy and all the stuff that had happened, or rather, had not happened, over the years and she said that when it was over, I’d wish I had. I thought, well, maybe, but I doubt it. Either way, I’ve made my decision and Vashti will not budge once her mind is made up. Hate to disappoint you, but I know myself better than you do (shocker huh) and I’m good. Rest assured, if the fates prove you right and someday I wish I had, I’ll let you know.
Even though it didn’t “hit me” like everyone swore it would, it did affect me. My step-mother lost her husband, my sister and brother lost their father, my aunts & uncles lost their brother, my cousins lost their uncle…people I care about lost someone they loved. My heart hurt for Uncle Ralph and Uncle Jim when they talked about not just losing a brother-in-law, but a friend, Uncle Ralph especially because they had been so close for so long. I will admit though, it was funny how in talking about his children they talked about Patrick and Brittany, but somehow, I got left out. C’mon gentlemen…I’m a big ol’ girl…how can ya miss me!
As cold as it may sound, the thing that worried me the most about Daddy’s condition was knowing that Patrick was about to be deployed, and that he’d be sent into a war zone wondering if his father was going to die. But fate stepped in and he was home got to spend time with Daddy before the end and for that I am eternally grateful. I loved Daddy because he was my Daddy. But the bottom line is that we weren’t close and the responsibility for that, to a certain degree, lay at both our feet. He was my Daddy and I see that, every time I look in the mirror. I have my father’s eyes. Besides, he gave me 2 of the best things ever…a great kid brother and an amazing head of hair.
Ok, now onto the good stuff!
We’ve officially started on the house! The slab was poured this past weekend and the living room is gonna be huge – 2, maybe 3 times the size of the living room nowIt’s a family reunion year! I’m really excited about that. I’ll admit that I love the actual event more than pretty much anything, but the planning is a lot of fun. A lot of work, but a lot of fun.
I have turned into a road trippin’ fool – the Pixie had had some miles put on her and there’s more in the future – 2 coming up in this month. On the first one in November, I met some folks and made some great new friends. One of which, I’m trying to figure out how even though we grew up totally different, how we have so much in common. There’s about 15 pounds less of me than there was in November – those cute jeans I bought to wear to the Peanut Festival that fit so good now look like a family of illegal aliens moved out – and there’s probably even more less (does that make sense) of me than there was on my last birthday. In fact, I’m sitting here in my “Elvis” jeans – black jeans with rhinestones on the legs that I haven’t work in about 4 1/2 – 5 years. Getting into these jeans was my goal #1. I don’t have a goal #2 because I had no idea when I’d get to goal #1.
Sis was telling me the other day about a conversation they had with Kayleigh’s counselor and from what I understood, not only would she be able to graduate a year early (she’s not, wants to grad with her pals) but because of her grades, she’s eligible for all kinds of scholarships and can pretty much write her own ticket. This only confirms what I’ve always believed…the kid’s the sharpest knife in the drawer. I am so proud of her it’s not funny. The idea that in less than year, she’s going to be 18 just blows my mind. I could have sworn we took her to her first day of kindergarten last August (I was a wreck that day). Aunt Katie (Kayleigh’s Grandmother) sent me a card and she said, “I can't believe how fast you girls are passing by the birthdays.” Yep…I get it now.
I know some folks who worry about getting older, but we’ve often quoted my Aunt Myrtle, “I can’t help getting older, but I don’t have to get old.”I said something the other day at work about being 36 and one of the students who was standing around said, “I can’t believe you just said that?” I asked what, and he said, “ Most women get cagy about how old they are, but you just put it out there.” Well why not? Forget this 18 or 21 years old with ___ of years experience. Nope, I’m here and like the old ladies I grew up watching, I’m just getting better. It’s usually women who fret about it, but I’ll never forget when Alan turned 30. Me, being me and loving Big Al like I do (and I mean that), came home with black balloons, I think a black cake was involved…and he looked at me and said, “You’ll be 30 one day too.” To which I replied, “Yeah Al, but you’ll be 35!” He didn’t but I swear he wanted to smack me, at the least throw something at me. How did what started out being an “All About Me” post turn out to be about everybody else? Easy. Even though it’s my birthday this year wouldn’t have been what it was, for better or worse, because of all ya’ll.
Do I have a plan for this year…you betcha! I’m gonna have the time of my life. I promise you, I will have an even better year and the “year in review March 2010” will be the icing on the cake only to be topped by “year in review March 2011”. I plan to put a bow in my hair, a crown on my head and do my best to have the best stories to tell in the old folks home when the time comes. Why not?
The thing to remember is that we’re gonna get old and when we do all we’ll have are the memories we make now, and not just the ones we make for ourselves, but the ones we leave with others. We’re all gonna die someday and when you die, the people – especially the kids in your life – you leave behind need to remember 3 things; how much you loved them, the things you taught them, and how much you loved life. Except for coffee cups, neither Granny nor any of the old ladies left me anything tangible but everyone of them; Granny, Mother, Granny Webb, Aunt Myrtle, Aunt Abbie, Aunt Helen Evans, Aunt Cedar, Aunt Dorice and God knows Aunt Mary – left me with the best memories of a bunch of old girls who would do or say anything (only Aunt Dorice tried to be kind all of the time), who told what was right and wrong, but most of all, that they loved me. Someday, when I kick off, I hope I can leave any of the kids who call me Buddy or Aunt Brandi with memories that are half as happy, crazy, loving or sweet as the ones I have, then I’ve done my job and I’m good to go.
New President (Jan. 2009)
I don’t believe that Pres. George W. Bush, thought not blame free, is completely to blame for the current situation our country is in. There were others involved – both Democrat and Republican – who either blocked or passed regulations and policies that got us to the point we’re in today. And just as one man isn’t responsible for getting us into our current hole, one man cannot get us out. The idea that President Obama will save us from the crisis we’re in and solve all of our problems and have us living in Utopia quicker than you can sing “We Are the World” is ludicrous, but there are folks who think, believe and KNOW he can. As my Granny used to say, “Mark my words…”, they, not the McCain supporters, not even the far right, will be the first ones to complain about what President Obama has not done, what campaign promises he failed to keep or how he’s changed his position on a “critical issue” and crossed over to the dark side. He will be disparaged by those who prior to his swearing in, we’re singing his praises the loudest.
I have all the respect in the world for President Barack Obama. He’s an intelligent, educated man who has chosen to put his not only life, but the lives of his family, on the line to hold this office. To be our hero when things are wonderful and be the whipping boy for the country when things are in the crapper. Like every other man elected to the Office of the President, Barack Obama will have to, as Shakespeare wrote in Hamlet,”… suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune…”
Like I said, I didn’t vote for Obama, I don’t agree with his platform or plans he has said that he has for this country, and I’m hoping that the combination of the advice of the group of people he’s chosen for his cabinet and common sense will override his Socialist/Communist leanings and he will do what is truly best for this country. Change is his buzz word, but what kind of change? Is change just for the sake of change a positive thing? Losing your job, your home, your family is a change, but is it a good one.
I can appreciate the history of this past presidential race and especially this moment. I know what it means for this country. For the first time, we had a woman (though I didn’t agree with her either) running for the Office of the President. I think about the fact that my Granny and all of her sisters, were born without the right to vote. Can you imagine being told that you can’t have a voice in who your leaders are? That you have to live and obey the laws of the land, but you have no say in what those laws and policies are that you're required to live by? I can’t. Very few, if any at all, can. Like it or not, agree with it or not, but now because of this election and because of the events of this day, there is no excuse for anyone to say,” I can’t because…”
Our job as Americans is to support and pray for our country and her leaders. Disagree with them, challenge them, question them, hold their feet to the fire, but the bottom line is that for this country to succeed and survive, we must, not should, but MUST support our leaders. That having been said…good luck and God bless MY President, Barack Obama, and God bless the USA!